RICHARDS, feia danelle

[FEIA DANELLE RICHARDS]

feia danelle richards
seventeen - junior - high school student - straight (bi-curious)

"
“feia danelle richards. thats my name so don’t wear it out... actually you can’t wear it out, only i can do that (; but come on.. its pretty right?! and before you go on and ask its fee-ah, not fay-ah.. feeee-aaahhh... got it? you better have it! thats all i have to say, unless you want to get into nicknames, which i only have two. fei, just plane jane, fee, or danni. but if you dare call me something else.. be prepared for the consequences.. joking.. there probably actually wont be any consequences seeing as i love nicknames! but still... nothing to bad or i might just have to beat you up! and that is a threat my dear-ies.”

“now how old am i? hmmm let me think! just kidding.. i’m seventeen baby. born on the lovely hot ass day july 14th, thats another thing you better remember, because like any girl i love me some presents! it does not have to be well you know extraordinary, but even a little card will make me happy.. because yes i am just a dork like that, but hey... who cares right? i don’t.. so you might as well not..”

“now we all have to have a job to survive in this money hungry world.. me i baby sit... or well i actually am.. was.. might still be a waitress.. its a confusing situation that i don’t like to go in a lot of the time since my personal life lately seemed to take over, and i am not even too sure if my job is still secure. but when i did waitress, i was damn good at it. i could, still probably can, walk home each week with more money in tips than my actual check will be, but... i will have to check back on that to see if i still have that job.. if not i guess i will just be a.. 95 percent time student.. the other five i still have to be a teenager.. and other things you know?”

“what do i look like? why don’t you just look at my facebook, or better yet look at me in person...? anywho.. i guess i can explain this for you my lovelies.. i am around... 5‘6 roughly? maybe? i might be adding an inch, but that doesn’t matter.. i don’t weigh a whole lot... but its more because i have a high metabolism.. and not something else.. but hey i am not to skinny.. i am just right in my own opinion. i have blue eyes (; very pretty eyes at that.. and this little freckle on my cheek that i just adore.. and i think that is about it? unless you want me to just down right give you my bra size.. ha.. you wish!”

“im not an easy person to explain personality wise.. i have never been, because it changes depending on who you are.. how close we are.. and many factors. but over all.. i am kind of a dork..i know some of the most random things that i don’t think you ever need to know.. but i do know them.. like did you know that ants never sleep.. ever in their entire life? and that brain cells are the longest living cell your body produces? i know stuff like that.. i’m also not big into cursing, even though i am guilty of it at times.. i say hell a lot but i normally stray away form other things.. hmm... i am smart? or i use to be before i missed half a school year and only scraped by to get in the grade i am in now.. i can be very funny.. and i am loving, but i have my temper. if i don’t know you i tend to be more closed off.. and we are close.. well i can be a ball full of crazy so watch out.. i know that doesn’t make a lot of sense.. but i recommend just getting to know me.. it will make a lot more since if you actually see how i act!”

“family? do i have any.. that is a crazy question. of course i do. i happen to live with my mommy dearest.. father, and my baby brother. i am a big daddy’s girl.. like MAJORLY... but that’s besides the point.. my family and i just moved to this town.. due to some things that happened back home.. but.. i’m not all into getting into that.. mainly because i am the reason we left.. but... oh well i guess this is just staying in between us so i can right?

i grew up in a little town about 200 miles form where i am now.. i was an honors student.. had everything going for me right.. that is until i met him.. he was 23.. i was 15.. but i didn’t stop.. i mean i couldn’t.. i was in love, and he was so gosh darn sweet.. my parents naturally didn’t agree.. but honestly we didn’t care, and now i see why, but then.. it was them just being stupid parents.. i have never been the healthiest of children.. i honestly have cytistic fibrosis.. which makes me sick very badly at times.. and being labeled going to die before i am thirty made me just want to be more rebellious when it comes to him.. and that i did..

i lost my virginity young.. only about 4 months after i started dating the man.. and it didn’t stop.. but i soon wished it would have.. he had me doing all sorts of things i shouldn't be doing.. sex.. the rambling around in a few different drugs.. and i mea.. i couldn't stop. when i was only 16.. in tenth grade at that.. i got pregnant.. with a man who was nearly 10 years older than me child.. my parents.. they were so upset. so close to wanting to disown me.. but they couldn’t.. because he left.. and i was alone.. fifteen and pregnant with a man who i thought loved me left.. but clearly he couldn’t have.. if he just upright and disappeared like that.. after doing so much to me.. getting me into so much..nnot that i blame him seeing as he had an option of getting married or going to jail for statutory rape.. something i doubted he wanted.. but he could have said goodbye.. he could have done something else. not the way he did...

i was so lost.. so ashamed of what i done.. everyone at school, even my friends seemed to turn their backs on me.. i was now the whore.. not the honors graduate.. not fei the use to be fun girl.. but feia.. the whore.. how did that make me feel? it hurt.. no.. it broke me down into a thousand.. no a billion little pieces.. like throwing rocks repeatedly at a mirror.. i shattered and it wouldn’t stop shattering.. i did something i never thought i would do.. self mutilation.. cutting.. whatever you wanted to call it became my best friend.. pregnant.. i was cutting myself.. not a healthy choice.. but it made things better or so i thought.. with my health declining from the outbursts of my disease.. do with the cutting and i.. was still playing around in some of the drugs i could get my hands on.. it was stupid.. but i didn't care.. i thought i wouldn’t make it. but i did.

i carried that baby.. my daughter.. adelina elisse richards.. my adel.. i carried her for 9 months.. but when she was born, i new something had went wrong.. she was only 4 lbs and 8 oz’s. she was tiny.. and that was my fault.. at sixteen.. hell.. i wasn’t even out of school yet.. i had brought a baby into the world who was smaller.. risking health issues because of what i did.. which naturally only made me feel worse about myself.. which was clear, because i wasn’t happy. post traumatic stress.. maybe.. but i had it..

the cutting didn't stop.. and i was a half.. am.. sitll sorta a half arce mom.. but i can't help it.. my life seems to suck.. i had to move 200 miles away where no one will know me.. where no one will know my problems.. about my baby.. my 4 month old baby.. who is the brightest thing that i have in my life.. but still can't seem to make me fully happy.. maybe if he came back.. maybe if he would come find me things would come back.. but that wont happen.. i am just about to be a typical teen mom.. just.. feia and adel.. that's all..."

click for adel
"

irl

ohai, my name is kaitlin but i go by kait (;, and i'm sixteen going on seventeen wonderful years old. i've been in this game for going on two years this julyy, and you can contact me via pm and aim/msn if you want it just askk, and i found this place by an add on another sitee.

There where things in life that you only experience one time, and then there are those people who you get the honor of sharing those moments with. Moments like everything that was unraveling in front of Kaler and Adri at this moment was one of those kinds of moments. Its a moment that neither of them will forget. A moment that they will look back on in twenty years sitting on a front porch somewhere laughing there asses off, because that was just them. They where those kind of people, and no matter what seemed to happen in life they would always be those people. Nothing could come through and change that. No single person could snake there way in between them and drive them apart like they have never been driven apart before. They are inseparable and have been since they where in about fourth grade. Calling each other every night, talking way passed their bed time with the covers pulled over their head to hide the fact they where on the phone. Whispering and faking asleep when either of their parents walked in. That was Kaler and Adri too this day that was them, besides the cover thing, and to be one hundred percent honest, being that person with Kaler was the best thing Adri had in her life at this moment.

From fighting with tent poles, to sitting on a cooler sipping on a beer, she doubted that tonight could get any better. Just watching the man work with all of the random poles that the twenty four year old girl would never be able to put up in her life, even if she had someone sitting in front of her, just was entertaining. Watching as he maneuvered things back and fourth, wiggling things here. Shoving poles there, it was starting to look more and more like he didn't have this like he said he did. No it was starting to look like the complete opposite of that. Which worked out in her favor seeing as in her head she had secretly placed a bet that he wouldn't be able to get it done. No it was just impossible, but once he had half of the tent get together, her little bet started to backfire. Or so she thought. This tent just seemed to literately be a piss of shit. Laughing slightly as she finished her beer sitting the empty bottle on the ground she stood up stretching. "Still got this shit baby?" The play full smirk resting on her lips as she slumped back down against the cooler. Her hazel eyes roaming over the man as she just shook her head.

There was no way a broken tent was going to ruin there night. It just wasn't going to happen. Not with Adri and Kaler it just didn't work that way. Yes it probably would have been simpler to get in the truck and drive a few minutes to Wall-mart and buy a new one, but did they ever take the simple way of things. No, not at all. “We're missing a couple poles, But it’s okay. We’ll improvise.” She could have guessed that. Letting a laugh leave her lips the young girl just looked at him for a moment shaking her head. "Figured you would. But I think that you just can't do it and you are just using the missing poles as an excuse." A smirk leaving her lips. There was no way in hell that Kaler was about to prove her wrong. If she couldn't do it Adri would be perfectly fine if Kaler couldn't do it either. Maybe it was cruel, or maybe it was the fact that she didn't want him to be better than yet another thing than her, even though it was quiet obvious that the man was much better with outdoorsy stuff like this. Hey, she just wasn't cut out for it, that's not her fault. Not saying she doesn't enjoy being outdoors, because that she does. Its more along the lines of she couldn't stay outdoors alone... But isn't that why she had Kaler?

Within minutes the contraption of poles and tarp had formed into a little, well a very make shift tent. Wouldn't this be just lovely. There was probably only two people in the world who would actually want to stay in something that even resembled the thing in front of them, and those two people happened to be Kaler and Adri. Maybe it was because they where use to doing things like this. Making something out of nothing and still managing to have a good time. Just that fact itself reassured the young girl as she stood up walking over to him, taking what he handed her, just looking at the tent for the longest moment, letting out a laugh. "Wow Kaler... Just wow. Only you would make something like that." Turning around on her heels she smiled at him as he sipped on his beer before slipping off into the edge of the woods where their things, and the bag for the tent was. Leaning down slowly picking up the bag, feeling something inside the bag, her eyes widening as her jaw dropped. "No..." Taking her hand she reached into the blue bag slipping out none other than the two black poles they needed. Her eyes closing as she wrapped her hand around them dropping the bag. Oh how Kaler was going to love this.

Not only could she not manage to put a tent together, it didn't even seem that she could unpack a tent properly. What was wrong with her? She wasn't that... helpless was she. No, there was no way. She had unpacked this tent at least twice before and taken everything out, but just this once, the one time they actually might need the tent to be full, she forgets the two main poles. What kind of shit is that. Biting on her lip she walked back to their little makeshift tent, and over to him. "Hey Kaler... guess what." Her hand came around holding the poles in her hand. "Guess this is just a sign you needed to get rid of that shitty little tent of yours... Right? Or... Should I run for making you tear up that little tent of yours?"

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