Post by MADISYN RAE WILLIAMS on Jan 29, 2011 8:46:48 GMT -8
madisyn rae williams
sixteen - sophomore - student - heterosexual
"
hey, i'm madisyn. well some people call me madi, actually, most people do. i'm rarely called madisyn. only by my parents and by my older sister because she hates me. oh and teachers. i'm sixteen years old, and i'm a sophomore in school. i'm not going to lie, i really do hate being so young and in school. school goes by so slowly, and when i think hard about it, i'm still in school for another two years after i finish my sophomore year. then i just go to another four years of college classes, and then go to work after. so really, by the time i die, i would have spent my entire life either in school or working. doesn't seem all that great to me.
determined. i've always been determined my mom tells me. when i want something, i go after it, and i don't give up until i have it. there aren't many things i want, or wanted in the past. but a few things that i've really wanted have been my camera. i really wanted a camera to start taking pictures because it sounded like something i'd really like. i'm not talking about the polaroid camera, or even a digital one. i'm talking about the professional one. y'know when you look through magazines and you see all those gorgeous pictures? yeah, a camera that takes pictures like that. the camera where you actually have to think about using it to take decent photos. anyways, i was fourteen when i really wanted it. i worked for two years to get it. i was too young to get a job, and i didn't get allowance. so i babysat a lot, and got paid that way. it took two years to save up for that, and half of one of those years i was in the hospital. well lets just say i finally got my camera after that incident.
scared. i always hate admitting this to people, but i guess i don't mind telling them just because i'm never going to see them after high school anyways, and by then i hope to have gotten rid of my fears. i'll be way out of here, other side of the world going to school and starting over, where no one knows me. anyways, i'm afraid of the dark. i know, it sounds childish, but i'm terrified of it. so if your with me, and it gets dark, don't be surprised if i grab onto you and don't let you go until it's light out. another thing i'm terrified of are storms. i'm pretty sure it's the thunder that scares me more than the lightning, but i guess it's really a mixture of it both that scares me. rain, i can handle (if its light out), but storms, i'll go crazy. usually i'll sneak my friends in at night to come lay with me so i don't start crying. usually the boys who actually will come lay with me. just because i don't trust girls to protect me.
innocent. which brings me to this. i'm pretty innocent when it comes to being a sixteen year old in high school. i've never kissed a boy. yes i've laid in bed with them, and yes i've cuddled with them in my bed and even slept in the same bed with them, but i've never kissed one. i've just been too afraid to. i'm not exactly shy, i just don't really like to make the first move. i know this is going to sound cheesy, but i've kind of always wanted it to be like the perfect first kiss y'know? like the ones in the movies and stuff. i know it will probably never happen, but a girl can hope can't she? i've also never touched alcohol or drugs or a cigarette. i've been offered many times, and i've even been around a group of kids who have been drinking and smoking, but never have i actually done anything. i'm too afraid to. too afraid of getting addicted like my brother and never being able to live a normal life.
my history? well where to start. i was born sixteen years ago on january second. of course, i was the last to be born in my family of eleven. i had nine brothers and sisters. eight brothers, one sister. then of course my parents and then at the time we had a dog. well i'm the youngest child to this couple, and it can be nice at times, but for the majority of the time, i'm not really noticed because all the other kids have stuff going for them. that or they are addicted to drugs or alcohol and have kind of just gone away from the family.
i grew up like a normal child would. at least until i hit middle school. i was always being picked on by these three girls. i guess you'd call them the 'popular chicks'. and they would always hurt me. i have to admit, when i was in middle school, i was a little overweight. and being picked on these girls all the time, made me realize i had to change to stop being picked on. so i stopped eating in ninth grade. at first i just stopped eating junk food. i would eat salads everyday and only drink water. i was losing weight, but i was still being picked on constantly so i finally just stopped eating everything. my parents never really caught on because my brother aaron who was seventeen at the time, got hooked on drugs and was always being rebellious, so my parents just kind of ignored the rest of us kids and gave him all their attention.
the end of ninth grade i was admitted into the hospital. i was losing so much weight, and my parents started to notice, but i just lied saying i was exercising a lot and eating healthier. well the first part was true, i was exercising a lot, but i wasn't eating. i would exercise and drink water. well one day when i was running, i felt really light headed, and i passed out. my parents took me into the hospital and i ended up in a treatment center for six months trying to get better. well now i'm out. i just got out about a month ago, and now i'm just trying to stop the rumors going around. apparently i was in the hospital for drug abuse? well according to a few people anyways. i just started back in school, and i'm kind of hoping that things are going to be okay and the bullying stopped. i mean, i did lose A LOT of weight for them.. and now i'm hoping things are going to be better.. key word, hoping.
"
irl
ohai, my name is mariahh, and i'm fifteen. i've been in this game for almost two years, and you can contact me via pm and aim/msn, and i found this place by some site. i dunn remember! D:.[/center][/size]
Being in a house with eleven other people every day really could stress a girl out. Especially one that was dealing with school work and being bullied. Mikayla was one of those girls who, even though she tried to ignore it, got all worked up about the littlest things. She cared what people thought about her, and when someone didn't like her, she tried everything to get them to like her. She didn't like to have enemies, but if she really didn't like someone, they would know. But the thing that bugged her the most, was why people didn't like her. Yeah she's had a few problems lately, and she isn't nearly as amazing as her siblings.. But why do people pick on her? Sure, she's short and she can get really hyper, but is that really any reason to not like someone? She could see how people got annoyed with her, but she knew how to be a good friend too. It was mostly the girls who hadn't liked her, for some reason Mikayla got along better with guys and she really just kind of gave up on trying to make more friends. She didn't have many as it was just because of the fact that she had been in treatment for the past year for her anorexia. It was pretty obvious that was why she was gone, but she didn't tell anyone about it, and she really didn't plan on talking about it with anyone.
That's why as soon as her mom and her eldest brother started to fight, the sixteen year old girl just grabbed her backpack and left. It wasn't like she was going to see anyone special, so she just slipped into a pair of sweatpants and put on a t-shirt over her bikini before she headed towards the beach, backpack in hand. She decided to leave her phone at home, so that way nobody could reach her and she didn't have to worry about anyone finding her. All she had was her ipod, a towel and her drawing pad and a few pencils. That was all she needed in order to relax at the beach. No matter how many people were there, or how hot/cold it was, or how loud it was. She could just put her headphones in and pull out her drawing pad to draw. Which is exactly what she had planned to do. Except when she arrived, she was surprised to see that there weren't many people there at all. She glanced around and only saw a couple walking around holding hands, and two or three families throughout the whole place. Mikayla smiled to herself and then sprinted over to a spot in the sand, a good ways away from the water, and then plopped down in the sand.
Mikayla of course, took of her flip flops and then pulled out her drawing pad and ipod. She put her headphones in and put the ipod on shuffle before she set the ipod down next to her and grabbed her drawing pad and then started to draw anything that came to her mind instantly. Which just happened to be a giant heart with a shadow. She started to write what she loved in life, and the things that mattered to her in small letters inside of the heart. Eventually, the whole heart would be filled up, and the drawing was something she could go back to when she felt like giving up on the world and running away or harming herself. Trust me, she's had these thoughts before. But shes always had someone or something keep her from doing this, and she knew that one day there wouldn't be anything to stop her and she'd end up just doing it. But today she was in one of those moods where she didn't care about anything. She didn't care who saw her, what she was wearing, or what anyone said about her. Today, she was just going to sit on the beach and relax, hoping that nobody interrupted her deep thinking and her concentration on the drawing in front of her.
